{"title":"The Dry Wit Collection","description":"\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cdiv style=\"background-color: #f9fafc; padding: 40px 20px; text-align: center; width: 100%; border-bottom: 1px solid #e8e8e8;\"\u003e\n\u003cdiv style=\"max-width: 680px; margin: 0 auto; font-family: 'Cormorant Garamond', serif;\"\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"font-size: 1rem; line-height: 1.9; color: #333333; font-style: italic; margin: 0;\"\u003e\u003cmeta charset=\"UTF-8\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSmart. Standards. Not sorry. The Dry Wit Collection is for the woman who's done shrinking to make others comfortable — not because she's angry, but because she's grown. Designed around the intelligence and quiet humor of the conservative woman who knows exactly where she stands, says exactly what she means, and finds the whole thing a little bit funny.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e\n\u003c\/div\u003e","products":[{"product_id":"savage-with-my-standards-shirt","title":"Savage With My Standards Shirt","description":"\u003cp\u003eShe's gracious. She's patient. She forgives quickly and gives generously. And she has a list of things she will not compromise on — not once, not for anyone.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThat's the shirt.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eFront chest: \u003cem\u003esoft with myself\u003c\/em\u003e — small, quiet, and exactly meant to be there.\u003cbr\u003e\nBack: \u003cstrong\u003eSAVAGE WITH MY STANDARDS\u003c\/strong\u003e — anatomical heart at center, surrounded by the full manifesto: Never Settle. Heart \u0026amp; Soul Only. Soft With Myself. Respect Is My Love Language. Sacred Body. Not For Everybody.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eSoft with herself. Savage with her standards. No contradiction.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Build\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\nUltra-soft 4.2 oz fabric. Cut for actual shape. Two-pass print front and back. Shoulder-to-shoulder taping. Tear-away label. Four colorways. Sizes XS–3XL.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n30 days. If you don't love it, we replace it. No forms. 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Didn't wait their turn. Didn't behave:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSojourner Truth. Marie Curie. Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Florence Nightingale. Amelia Earhart. Katherine Johnson.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eAll six, illustrated, named, and wearing it like the record they actually left behind.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eFlip the collar: \u003cem\u003e\"Dare to disrupt. Lead with intention.\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003eThat's the instruction. The shirt is the reminder.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Build\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eUltra-soft 4.2 oz combed and fabric. for actual shape. Two-pass print. Shoulder-to-shoulder taping. Tear-away label. Five colorways. Sizes XS–3XL.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e30 days. If you don't love it, we replace it. No forms. No friction.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"font-claude-response-body break-words whitespace-normal\"\u003e\u003cem\u003eExtended sizes (4XL–5XL): contact us at \u003ca class=\"underline underline underline-offset-2 decoration-1 decoration-current\/40 hover:decoration-current focus:decoration-current\" href=\"mailto:studio@vitalthreadsclothing.com\"\u003estudio@vitalthreadsclothing.com\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"font-family: 'Cormorant Garamond', serif; font-size: 0.9rem; letter-spacing: 2px; text-align: center; margin-top: 20px; color: #333333; font-style: italic;\"\u003eExplore the full \u003ca href=\"\/collections\/middle-ground\" style=\"color: #333333;\"\u003eMiddle Ground Collection\u003c\/a\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Vital Threads","offers":[{"title":"Vintage Black \/ XS","offer_id":43920524312710,"sku":"aafdc442-fea7-4d0a-bc18-eb7ceb17b0b8","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Vintage Black \/ 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You've been at the dinner table. You've been in the group chat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eYou said nothing. You get zero credit for that.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eFront chest: \u003cem\u003ei never get enough credit for the things i manage not to say.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eFlip the collar: \u003cem\u003e\"You have no idea what I almost said, but my face probably said it already.\"\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003eThat's the whole shirt. Both halves of it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Build\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\nUltra-soft 4.2 oz combed and fabric. for actual shape. print. Shoulder-to-shoulder taping. Tear-away label. Five colorways. Sizes XS–3XL.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Guarantee\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\n30 days. If you don't love it, we replace it. No forms. No friction.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eExtended sizes (4XL–5XL): contact us at \u003ca href=\"mailto:studio@vitalthreadsclothing.com\"\u003estudio@vitalthreadsclothing.com\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp style=\"font-family: 'Cormorant Garamond', serif; font-size: 0.9rem; letter-spacing: 2px; text-align: center; margin-top: 20px; color: #333333; font-style: italic;\"\u003eExplore the full \u003ca href=\"\/collections\/middle-ground\" style=\"color: #333333;\"\u003eMiddle Ground Collection\u003c\/a\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Vital Threads","offers":[{"title":"Soft Cream \/ XS","offer_id":43956568260742,"sku":"7d335460-cebd-4f87-a39c-88c7fd6bdc51","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Soft Cream \/ S","offer_id":43956568293510,"sku":"83c1b924-0c49-4056-8d3e-7f886635750d","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Soft Cream \/ 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